Sometimes it feels like I’m living and seeing through a bubble darkened with grime. Lost sight of what I’m doing. Has that ever happened to you? Drifting through life without much of a purpose. Maybe it’s a phase. Maybe the purpose needs to find me. God knows I’ve been looking for it; an injection of excitement whenever I think I’ve found it, but the purpose always gets yanked out from under my feet, and all I can do is watch it go as I fall in slow motion back into the strange feeling of indifference.
Maybe we’re looking in all the wrong frequencies for Him. Closer than you think, but never in the last place you look; maybe God lives only in our dreams.
You dream, and you wake up. The dreams are etched into the forebrain, but they fade like the glow from heated glass. They’re drowned by the rush of reality that closes over you as soon as you wake – a reality with just as tight a grip on you as last night’s nightmare. Dreams of separation, of reunion, dreams of wealth and loss and death, a whole jamboree that you’ll dream before the night is through. Dreams so sharp they cut into your waking life, leaving you wondering at their existence. Dreams of a memory; the taste of a kiss, or a flight of birds over a white sky, or the unexplainable look that passes between two complete strangers.
Dreams are a conduit for the brain. A way to harmlessly discharge excess baggage of the day. All the surplus guilt, fear and regrets filter into your dreams. All the excess happiness too. The mind is a dumping ground and it uses the garbage in lunatic ways, forcing together the mismatched pieces of different puzzles.
And if reality can leak into dreams, the opposite is also true.
Look. Life is just a latticework of rules. Dreams are sealed up in a small part of this lattice, like cytoplasm bounded by a cell membrane. They’re kept from interacting with everything else. But if you have the right trigger, the right opening, a small dream will bleed through into life.
There is a town where dreams come true. You can explore all those alleys you never had the time for. You can turn and face the monster that chased you down your childhood years. You can fly through the sky on wings of air without fear of falling while the town comes to life below.
But I cannot find that town anymore.
Pretty rough, and I’m not sure it all comes together. Inspired by the Silent Hill series. Much thanks to Konami for making the first truly mature horror videogame.